Cloud DancingIndex | Time Under Chaos | Game Logs | PreGameLogs | Cloud Dancing [Dateline: immediate Pre-Game] Kolvir howled. Summer in Amber brought with it warm trade winds that gusted off the ocean and pounded into the sheer cliffs of Kolvir. Before shrieking down into the Valley of Garnath, the winds created an invisible geography of currents and zephyrs amongst the peaks and plateaus of the majestic mountain. If there were few reasons to climb the steep slopes, there were fewer still to do so when the winds were up. So, for most people, the small ridge overlooking the city would have been an ill-chosen place for a picnic. But Solitaire Helgram was not most people. The little woman stood at the sheer edge, leaning out at an angle that defied gravity. Gusts of wind wrapped around her lithe form, holding her aloft and blowing her short hair around like whips. For someone frightened of life, Tear appeared perfectly at ease with this precarious position. Then again, it was she controlling the winds for the moment; not the ill-tempered laws of nature. All she had to fear was her own limitations. Another gust lifted her back; letting her half float for a stomach-churning second, before she collapsed onto the ground with a delighted giggle. Violet eyes gazed up at Vikund adoringly, wild with excitement. "Thank you for taking me kite-flying," she said, breathing hard with the exertion of guiding the wind away from their picnic spot. "Mandor thinks it's frivolous and Tanstaafl complains about his fur getting mussed up. I'm so glad we have the time away from them to do something… special." Vikund helped Tear to her feet, laughing with her. "And they once said you couldn't cure the elements of Amber without the Jewel. You are Amber's Jewel now, Tear of Helgram," he smiled. "Have you mastered all the elements now?" Tear slipped her arms around his waist, snuggling in against his chest for a moment. "Mastered? Hardly. I still can't summon them. But that'll come later." She leaned her head back and grinned up at him. "That's very sweet though," she said. "What you said. You always know how to make me smile. Must be the diplomatic training, yes?" Vikund leaned down and kissed her gently. "And I you," he said. "And I will again remind you I am not a diplomat. There are others who train long years to earn that title. To call me such is to do them a disservice. I am a facilitator, that is all." He offered his arm. "Shall we go a little higher? There's plenty of mountain, and the views are stunning. Please don't summon any rainstorms though, ok?" She slipped her arm into his and leaned her head against his arm as they walked along the narrow edge. "As I said, I can't summon rain or lightning. Yet. But I'll make sure any showers that might show up stay at the far end of the mountain. I want nothing to ruin our day together." Tear let out a contented laugh. She started to say something and then shook her head. "Don't start going coy on me," Vikund chided lightly. "Speak your mind." Tear hunched her shoulders as they began following a wide fissure in the rock; its sheer walls smoothed and polished by a thousand seasons. "You just make me happy is all," she said. "I guess. I'm just glad for that. And I wonder. Where we'll be in the future. With my schooling coming to an end, I've considered traveling in Shadow a little. If Mandor allows me. But. When I think about that...I..." She tilted her head to gaze up at him with those eternally innocent eyes of hers. "Do you ever think of the future, Vikund? You've lived a dozen of my lifetimes. So, do you even look forward any more? Or just into your past?" "A dozen?" Vikund said with mock horror. "I'm not quite *that* old!" He have her a playful hug. "I must admit, I don't look forward much at all. I live for today. I don't have any confidence in my future, and would rather forget the past. Maybe that's why you lift my spirits so," he smiled. "You are not yet jaded by the intrigues of court. Don't ever let me or anyone else dampen your enthusiasm." Tear melted beneath the hug and slipped her tiny arm around his waist. "I'll try not to then. For your sake." She chuckled and leaned against him as they strolled over the worn stone. "Seriously though," she added. "You should look up from your life and see what's out there. I've found. Well. No offense. But the elders seem so wrapped up in their plotting, they can't see what life has to offer. Not even what's right in front of their noses." Tear paused for a moment and chewed her lip. He knew her habits by now and realized she was weighing her next words. "Do you know what my future will be?" she finally said. "Will I be allowed one? Will I be allowed to choose… who I want to marry?" "Well, I will admit to dabbling in a political pie or two, but I hardly rank as an Elder," Vikund replied. "I think I can see what's before me well enough," and he gave her a nuzzling kiss to the neck. "As to marriage, I don't know, is the honest answer. As a noble of Helgram, I suspect your family will want a say in who you are betrothed to." He looked suddenly solemn. "I'm sure Master Mandor will be able to arrange a high-born match for you." Tear let out a contented gasp as his lips found her neck. Before their relationship had begun, she'd never have even considered allowing someone to kiss her there. But now, she couldn't get enough of this scandalous form of intimacy. She let out another giggle and pulled away so she could hold his hand. She might enjoy his affections, but timidity still ruled her heart. His words darkened her mood; delicate fingers tightening around his. "But. I don't want someone else to choose. I know that. Being a noble woman. That may not be a choice. But it isn't fair." Tear stared up at him, trying to appear determined. "I want to marry who I choose. When I choose." Tear let out a contented gasp as his lips found her neck. Before their relationship had begun, she'd never have even considered allowing someone to kiss her there. But now, she couldn't get enough of this scandalous form of intimacy. She let out another giggle and pulled away so she could hold his hand. She might enjoy his affections, but timidity still ruled her heart. His words darkened her mood; delicate fingers tightening around his. "But. I don't want someone else to choose. I know that. Being a noble woman. That may not be a choice. But it isn't fair." Tear stared up at him, trying to appear determined. "I want to marry who I choose. When I choose." "Haven't I told you enough tales of nobles who acted out of love, and ended in tragedy?" Vikund asked, clasping her hands in his. "Life is not as simple as grabbing what you want and hoping no-one will try to take it away. You are a high-born lady of Chaos, perhaps higher than even you realise. Have you thought about the succession? Have you considered why the Prime Minister might be grooming you as his apprentice? I assure you it is not out of altruism." "Whatever plans he may have for you in the future, I suspect he will not be pleased with anyone who might stand in their way," he said ominously. Tear opened her mouth to protest the comments regarding her mentor, but then bit her tongue. She could no longer deny the doubts that had been invading her thoughts. The illusions of a ten-year old girl seeking a father had begun to fade like mist. Mandor wanted something from her. And considering Fiona's recent interests in her, Tear had to wonder if he wanted more than a student for himself. Yet, how had her mother been allowed to marry a common man? If mama could do such a thing, why not her? "Whatever plans he may have for you in the future, I suspect he will not be pleased with anyone who might stand in their way," he said ominously. "He's spoken to you about me, hasn't he?" Tear said, looking up at him. "Warned you against. Us. Becoming. Closer." She paused, turning to hold his hands between them. A cloud passed over, darkening the narrow fissure and casting them grayish light. "He has hasn't he?" "No," Vikund replied, "but he didn't have to. Speak to your peers in Chaos, or maybe at the Embassy. There you will find your answers; I'm afraid on this occasion I have none." "I don't understand why you are dwelling on this now, though. There is so much of your life ahead of you," he continued. Vikund looked upward then, through the mist that threatened to obscure the summit. "Because I don't want to be one hundred years old and find myself alone," Tear said. But the conversation and ill tidings behind it would wait for now. She shivered and leaned closer to Vikund as they resumed their walk through the twisting passage. "Have you spoken to Mandor about Tir, the moonlit city? I wonder if you asked, would he let you walk along its ghostly paths?" "Tir? No, I haven't, but he knows I want to go," Tear said. She smiled faintly, almost wickedly, if she could manage such an expression. "He's afraid of me going up there. I can see it in his eyes." She squeezed his fingers and gave him a wink. "I've been listening to your advice. Surprised? "Pleasantly so," Vikund smiled. "Anyhow. I think he's unnerved by the thought of me finding out about my past. That maybe I'll finally discover why I am the way I am." "Then you must go," Vikund said. "You should ask, but....would you go even if he forbade it?" Tear wanted to say, 'yes,' but the would have been a lie. She sighed inwardly, "No. He's like my father, Vikund. How could I disobey him on… on /that/. People have died going against him on that issue. It'd hurt him, if I disobeyed him. And I…" "I love him," she admitted. "Ill-tempered or no. He helped me become who I am. And can't throw that back in his face by being so selfish." Vikund frowned. "I would be careful about comparing him with your father," he said carefully. "A mentor and a teacher he may be, but he has daughters of his own, and... they have what I would call an unconventional relationship. Your father died for you. I can't say that the Prime Minister would do the same." "That's the point, my dear," Tear said. "My father died. I have my uncle, true. But to him I am… a reminder. Master Mandor…" She sighed weakly and gave a nod in resolution. "He treats his daughters poorly doesn't he? I saw how he treated Princess Cly like she's… nothing. And she is so nice. And smart. I always wonder if she hates me because her father favors me so. Overtly." "I find it hard to believe anyone could hate you," Vikund said. "I think the Princess will understand." Tear gave a wan smile; half believing his words. Her dark bangs hid the doubt in his eyes. Her hand tightened. "Sometimes. He. I. Wonder. You know? What he really wants with me. But. It doesn't change the fact he helped raise me." They'd reached a fork where a fault had opened up two wide fissures in the rock face. Tear paused and then regarded Vikund. "Did you want to go on or upwards? I can make us some stairs if you like. It won't take long." "Upwards, into the clouds," Vikund replied cheerfully. "We can go by any means you choose." Tear chuckled and raised his hand to her lips. "Yes. Let us leave the shadows behind. We have so little time together. Why waste it on melancholy?" She reluctantly stepped away from him and focused her attention on the jagged rock face. "You may want to get behind me, in case something loose gives way," she warned. Vikund wordlessly did as he was bid. For a moment, she stood perfectly still with arms extended at waist level. As she summoned her connection to the Earth, the little woman appeared to grow in stature; an illusionary effect but no less impressive. When she clapped her hands sharply, the wall of the crevice growled in protest and sent a shower of dust and stones tumbling down. The rock began to move, slowly at first, but then with increased alacrity as Tear's connection with its essence strengthened. Crude but fashioned stairs began to emerge from the stone, one after the other. It took her ten minutes of unyielding concentration, but soon enough they had a natural staircase that led up to the blue light of day. As the connection broke, Tear stumbled back into Vikund's arms with a distressed gasp. "Ooo… dizzy," she muttered, touching her head. "I keep forgetting how old and ornery this mountain is. We'd better get moving before it changes its mind." Vikund caught her and chuckled. "It probably doesn't like being manipulated," he concurred. "Would you like me to carry you, or will you be ok?" Tear gave him a wry grin and pressed back against him. "Oh sure. You'd drop me. Besides the only place I want you to carry me is over the threshold." The moment's 'wickedness' passed quickly; her cheeks and ears flaring red. She pulled away from him and began the comfortable climb up the stairs. Not an particularly elegant or athletic woman, she had to run her hand along the rock face for balance. Her short legs certainly didn't help either. But after a pleasant climb, she emerged on top of a gentler slope. She looked back and offered Vikund a hand up. "You were right. It's beautiful. I don't think I've ever been up this high before." Vikund gratefully accepted her hand and made his way up, dusting himself down. He looked quite shaken, and it wasn't from the climb. The slope they found themselves on had been blasted by the wind and rain over countless millennia. Only a thin layer of moss and lichens covered the rocks, broken by the occasional stunted fir tree. Although the city below remained cast in grey, the sun broke through the cloud cover here and warmed them. Even the wind had died down slightly; blocked as it was by Kolvir's peaks. Tear straightened her dress and smiled at him, unsure. "Are you okay? You didn't trip or something." She squeezed his hand, sensing his unease. "No, thank you, I'm fine," Vikund replied, sucking in a lungful of the clean, crisp mountain air. "You can't smell the city at all up here," he said, gripping her hand more tightly as if the dampness on their skin were conspiring to part them. "It's as if it's in a different Shadow altogether and we are here alone at the centre of things. I wonder if that's how Dworkin and Corwin felt, when they drew their designs. It must have been quite a thing, to stand and witness that." Tear settled into his arms, resting the back of her head against his chest. She held his arms around her waist, linking fingers. "That's a beautiful image," she said. "And that's how I feel when I'm with you. Like being at the center of everything." Her hands tightened, frightened to part for even a moment. "I wish I could have met him," she said. "Dworkin, I mean. What must it have been like to. To weave an entire universe into creation. It is such a wondrous place. "But you know me. All I can think of is the questions I'd ask him. How'd you did it? Why'd you do it that way? Why is the sky blue instead of green?" A single hand reached back to touch his cheek. "Until I met you'd I'd never just stand here and look out at the view. I think that's been your greatest gift to me. I don't feel like I have to analyze the fabric of existence when I'm with you. I can just be at peace." Vikund smiled, his levity apparently restored. Her hand returned to its proper place; entwined with his. "Darling? Where's the Rebma from here?" "A couple of dozen paces higher, and a little more to the West, and we should be able to see the sea. From there, it's a long way down. I'm afraid there's no sign of it from Kolvir," Vikund replied, pointing. "Have you ever been to Rebma?" "Nope," Tear said with a sigh. "I can speak almost every one of their dialects now, but still haven't set foot in their city. It's rather pathetic on my part. But this, for example, is my first real... escape. Not since our picnic. Finals are keeping me at the castle. And at home. You'd be amazed how much time these experiments are taking me." She raised his hand up to her cheek, guiding his fingers along her cheekbone. "Maybe. We can go there some time? When we're both free. You know. Like a couple would go on vacation. Or whatever it is couples do." "I'm not sure I would be permitted to go, but... I could try. Why don't we take E'lbram too? She could be our excuse to visit," Vikund pondered. "Your finals will soon be over and then...we will see." "Really?! You think so," Tear said excitedly, physically shaking with energy. "Maybe we could make it like. A graduation thingie? Yeah. My one big gift for twelve years of schooling. And Auntie wouldn't pass up the chance to see her home. More recipes to discover." She hugged his arms around her. "And there'd better be much fawning and smooching involved. On your part, of course. After all, it's my special gift. And I /am/ a baroness. I have needs, you know." Tear let out a wicked giggle. Vikund laughed. "Calm down! I will *try*; don't be disappointed if Mandor says no. He is very protective of you." "But I *can* be very persuasive," he smiled. "As well as being able to fawn and smooch." "Well, as long as the majority of the smooching is directed my way, I can accept that I suppose," Tear said with mock-snootiness. The humor ebbed from her face for a moment as reality settled in. "You don't think. No. He wouldn't. Would he?" she muttered. "Do you think he's saving me to become the next.." Pause. "Fiona in his life?" "I think there is only room for one of those," Vikund replied, "I was wondering rather if he would try to impose one of his brothers on you, but perhaps he would have done so already if that was his plan." "Let's not worry about that now. Shall we go and look at the ocean?" he said, patting her arm. Tear nodded anxiously and reached up to squeeze his hand. "You're absolutely right," she said. "Enough worry for one day. Let's see the ocean and fly my kite, shall we?" "Let's," Vikund replied. She slipped from his arms and began to walk on up ahead. As they walked, she paused to examine various stones and plants. She'd point out an oddly-shaped pinecone or brilliantly colored lichen with childlike innocence and enthusiasm. She had a plethora of information about each of her discoveries, usually on how to transform a certain flower or fir needle into a medicinal tea. When they reached the ledge overlooking the vastness of blue water, Tear set her things down on a comfortable bed of moss. Carefully, she went to work on her fish-shaped kite. "Because you brought me her, you get to fly it first, okay?" Tear finished assembling the long fish kite, making certain the supports for its huge maw were secure. She handed him the string and stretched the kite out as best as she could with her stubby arms. "'Kay. Ready for you, my dear," she said. A horrid thought entered her head. With wide violet eyes, she stuttered, "Don't run near the edge, Vikund. If you trip. I. I. Can't." She fought to smile through her fear, unable to finish the thought. Maybe kite flying atop Kolvir wasn't such a safe idea after all. "Don't worry," Vikund smiled. "Even if I fall off, it takes so long to reach the bottom I could use a trump. Remember Bleys!" He said cheerfully. "Now launch!" He cried. As she released the kite, he ran a short distance down the hill (and away from the ledge, no doubt to her relief), allowing the wind to fill the kite's sails and send it soaring upward, where it gaped like a hungry monster. Tear stood there, covering her mouth and holding her breath as Vikund ran; terrified that he'd fall. She almost missed how beautiful the kite was against the blue sky and clouds. But once the creature of paper and ribbon took lit, her eyes moved skyward to follow its elegant path. Her fear bled away and she began jumping up and down, clapping excitedly. She rushed down the slope to stand beside Vikund. "You did it! And on the first try too. Oh, isn't it beautiful?" The fish 'swam' through the currents of air, as if it were its aquatic counterpart in a vast ocean of blue and white. "It is beautiful," Vikund agreed, "just like you." He offered her the strings. "Here, you have a go." "Flatterer," Tear chuckled, taking the strings carefully. To her credit, she was a consummate kite flyer, making the fly swim and jump through the air. She leaned back against Vikund, resting her head against his chest. "Thank you, Vikund. For today. And all the days." Perhaps it was just the whisper of the wind, but he swore he heard her say something that sounded very much like, "I love you." If he heard it, he pretended not to. Of course, with the wind it was entirely possible he hadn't. Instead, he responded to her first statement. "You're welcome. Thank you for being here, and being uniquely you." As she leaned against him, he kissed her on the cheek. Tear let out a contented purr, quite pleased by his words and the touch of his lips against her skin. Relieved that he apparently hadn't heard her admission, she said nothing further. "You're rather good at this," he commented with a smile. "I think you have a natural sympathy with the elements." "They're being nice to me, today," Tear said. "They react to you mood and feed off it. So, most of the credit is yours, my sweet." She reached back with one hand, guiding his arms around her waist. And that's how she stayed for some time; utterly content to be the only two people above the clouds, above the universe it. What more could she ask for out of life than that? Thread Swimming with Sharks follows on from this.
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